Celebrating a heartbreak

I am celebrating a heartbreak!
Come on man! What bullshit is that?
No! I'm serious. I AM celebrating a heartbreak.
yeah right! Its just all that beer talking. That's it! you're not having any more.
No way man. I just got started. The beer is just the catalyst man. It enables clarity of thought. All that was at the back of your head & you wanted to say. Everything we file away for posterity just comes pouring out.
In other words, stuff you would otherwise be embarassed about, when sober?Come off it dude.
Dude, I am not drunk!
Famous last words!"I wasn't drunk, I was just checking to see how quickly the car could stop!"
Well, see.Imagine someone close to you dies. What do you do?
Mourn of course, except if its my mother-in-law! Then i'd agree with your celebrating theory!Granted!
Anyway, so here you are mourning & for how long? just a few days. Then you call everybody over & feed them a lavish lunch, while everyone sings praises of the departed one. Is this not celebrating?
Hmm..probably.
Hah! Probably? have some more beer dude. Your archives are still not ready to come our eh?Anyway, you first go into denial. No way can this person be dead anymore. How can someone you spoke to in the morning, just stop being that person anymore. At first you just don't know how to deal with all that vaccum.It's vaccum in a way isn't it? You were so used to having this person around you that you hardly noticed the space they occupied, took for granted.Well, not always, but in a sense.It was a place in your sphere you were used to seeing being occupied. Realising that this vaccum now needs to be dealt with leads to Anger.Anger at being cheated of her presence.
Did you just say "her"??
In a way of speaking, of course. I am not biasing this on gender. Just figuratively speaking. Don't go reading between the lines & stop trying to sidetrack me. So, then come the questions. Why her? why now? why this way? why so suddenly? so many why's.Finally when we accept the fact, or rather resign ourselves to accepting the fact, we have most of the answers.
Why resigned to accept? Isn't that being very pragmatic?
Well, look at everything in hindsight. Even your sub-concious decisons are pragmatic!
I beg to disagree. Being in love is anything but pragmatic.
That's what you think! When all the shine wears off, or at least one person thinks the shine has gone off the new found love, its bye bye time my friend. Then comes pragmatism again & the dawn of a heartbreak!
There we go again. Man! you are so twisted. But this is getting interesting. Go on.
Ok. So now that we have established that the heartbreak has happened, what are your choices? You start treating this as the death of an emotion. Something that was nurtured & gave you immense joy, but now it is not there anymore. Its like a tree you plant.
Dude! I get the idea. Enough of the anlogies.
Chill man! I think you just scared that chick away
What?where? was she the one in red?
Got you! wait till I tell your wife about this. Anyway getting back to what i was telling you. So now you start seeing the emotion as one that you are mourning. So, the stages you go through are pretty similar.
Does this mean you get to pay the bill tonight?
Hmm..see what i said about Pragmatism!
Touche!
So, now I am at the stage where i know that she is gone & won't come back. If we do meet years down the line, I am not sure if she will look the same or feel the same.I have gone through all those stages & today it dawned that I am at the stage where I am celebrating my heartbreak.So, yes my man, your drinks are on me. I am finally going to start a new phase.I am not going to live in the past & am going to move on. I am buying a new bike first thing tomorrow.

Composed when drinking alone in a bar...shows eh? ;)